How should you prepare for a difficult conversation?

A piece I shared on preparing for difficult conversations, drawn from an interview with Chris Voss, the former FBI hostage negotiator.

His central point is that we rehearse difficult conversations without realising it, usually by picturing ourselves getting angry, and we then fall back on whatever we rehearsed. He suggests preparing the way athletes do: envisaging a calm tone and a good outcome, starting by naming the other person’s negative view of you, making them feel heard before explaining anything, and ending on something positive.

“You need to do what athletes do.”Chris Voss

Excerpt and summary only. The interview is the work of its original publisher; Chris Voss sets out these ideas in full in Never Split the Difference.